by Jannett Morrow
op·po·nent
/əˈpōnənt/ - noun
1. someone who competes against or fights another in a contest, game, or argument; a rival or adversary. (www.google.com)
When you think about opponents, do you think about only people, or do you think about things or situations? People in the sense that they are coming against you to stop you from moving forward and progressing in life. Whether it be by what they say to you, what they do to you, or say about you. Well, this is one way that is common to think about opponents. However, as important as that, things, and situations, also play a big part in being opponents in your life.
Things such as, wasting time, procrastination, or low self-esteem are a few opponents. Situations such as, losing a loved one or job unexpectantly, being challenged in your health, or getting a failing grade on an exam, are a few opponents. Broadening your understanding of the definition of this word, can help you to really see things in your life that may be trying to hinder your forward progress in life. You want to know this!
Can those things that are trying to oppose you in life, be a help or benefit for you? Let’s explore!
The Unexpected Opponents
When a job loss unexpectantly occurs, what are the first reactions that may happen? You feel angry or upset. You may say somethings that you should not say. Some people get violent. You may resist leaving. You may get depressed or discouraged or many other things. All of these reactions can lead you to a certain state of mind that comes against your self confidence and self-esteem.
Studies show that about 85% of adults and adolescents have an issue with low self- esteem. Self-esteem and self-confidence are different. Self-esteem deals with how you feel about yourself, and self-confidence deals with how you feel about your abilities. Both effects how you react to things in your life.
This is one reason to trust, that even in the unexpected moments in your life, God is still present to help you through. He has made you to be an overcomer, even in hard times. This is true!
It’s Time To Fight!
When your level of esteem and confidence are low, you can tend to make wrong or irrational decisions. This is because your state of mind is challenged to think that you have to do something drastic to change your situation. This is why you may get the urge to want to fight and some people actually do. However, you know that the end result of such actions, do not lead to good things. This is where the opponents win in your life. They have successfully derailed you from positive progression happening in your life for that moment.
These opponents have accomplished their goals of getting you off focus and sidelined. They have stopped your forward motion. Now they are accomplishing their next objective, which is to make you see yourself less than you really are, to mess with your self-image.
How you see yourself is very important for your overall success in life. When you see yourself as one who can accomplish what you put your mind to do because you know you have the ability to do so, you will get a lot done. On the flip side, however, if you see yourself as one who can never get anything done because you don’t have the right education, the right amount of money, etc., this will limit what you do. You can be a person that has a positive outlook and manifest your greatness.
Your Response
Are you going to let this happen to you? Are you going to let outside things and situations dictate who you are and what you can do? I hope not!
You are more than you think you are. You have more to offer than you think you do. Just because this minor setback has come, it does not mean that it’s over for you. Have you ever heard that a just man may fall seven times, but he gets up again?
Well, it’s true! Your way to success in life, is that you get up again and keep trying. You say it’s hard, but I say to you, it’s doable!
Your focus is needed in order to accomplish it. Focus on what? Well, focus on being real with yourself and acknowledging where you are in your feelings over what has happened to oppose you.
Not brushing it under the table or rug, so to speak, but really dealing with how you feel. Are you hurt, mad, angry, disappointed, disgusted, sad? etc. Be real about it! Whatever you are feeling, it’s ok, just don’t stay there if it’s not helping you get back up and try again. Find a friend you can be real with to help you in this process.
Managing your emotions well is another important factor in this growth and development journey you are in. If you do, you grow and if you don’t you won’t. You just may end up in cycles that need to be broken later. Not a good place to be.
When you allow your focus to be where it needs to be, you open the door to all God wants to show you about your situation. This is where wisdom shows up.
3 Ways To Fight Your Best Fight:
1. Get Focused
Think about it, when you are focused on baking something from a recipe, you are intentional about getting all the right ingredients and the right tools, to make sure the end result is what you want it to be. Well, it’s the same for dealing with the opponents that rise up in your life. You have to make sure you have the right self-talk, good support system you can talk to, and the desire to not get stuck. These things you can look at as the ingredients/tools you need for the recipe of success in fighting your best fight.
Your focus is key for you to go in the right direction of knowing you can overcome the opposition. It’s all in what you know to be true. Even though you may be angry, sad, pissed off, disappointed, discouraged, etc., is it not true that these are just emotions, and you have the ability to change them? Yes, this is true!
You can choose to be the opposite of sad, get happy. You can choose to be the opposite of angry, get calm. You can choose to be the opposite of disappointed, get satisfied. You can choose to be the opposite of discouraged, get encouraged. You can choose!
The right self-talk can help you with this. “I will not be defeated by this!”, “I am going to choose to be encouraged, even though I feel like crying!”, “You are better than this moment!”, “You have a lot to offer, regardless of what this looks like!”, etc. All of these statements are helping you to shift your focus from the negative things to positive things, thus helping you to think more clearly and be focused.
Your focus is to not let the opposition stop your forward progress or sideline you. You have more life to live and a lot, still, to contribute to making others’ lives be better. A good support system can help you be focused by helping you to see alternative ways to look at your situation. Helping you to sort out your feelings and emotions or by helping you to get your mind off of the situation for a while. All of these things can help you be in the right frame of mind to fight your best fight.
2. Look At Opponents As A Gift
This seems crazy, you say! “Things coming against me, can be a gift?” Yes, that is what I said!
When a football team gets on the field to play a game, they have taken time before hand to watch video of how their opponents play. How they do their set ups. How they react to certain plays, etc. This is a gift for them to be able to study out their opponents before they play them in a game. Do you agree? Well, this is the same for the opponents that come against you.
You can be on the offensive with these opponents before you encounter them. You can be prepared for when they try to show up. Then when they do, they give you a chance to practice all that you have learned as you prepared for them. This is where looking at them as a gift comes in. For the football players, all of their practice time and study time has prepared them for the actual game. This is the time where their opponents will be coming against them. Now they can use their tools of self-confidence, endurance, and situational awareness to help them to win the game.
Opponents can help you become your best self. They challenge you to train your spiritual muscles, study, reflect on past situations and make needed adjustments. All of these things help you move forward and grow if you let them. This is why opponents can be a gift. With the example of the football players, if they did not have any opponents, what is pushing them to be better, to be psyched about winning another game, to want to press forward and be a better team? Nothing really! So, the same is for your opponents, whatever they may be, they are helping you get better at something. Take some time to reflect on that.
3. Know Your Value
When you know your value, there is not much that you let keep you down, no matter what it is. So, you getting yourself to the level of knowing you are well able to overcome any moment, any opposition, will give you a big advantage in fighting your best fight. Why is it your best fight because you win every time. If you don’t give up and quit, you win! This time is no different.
Depression is beneath you, pity is beneath you, rage and acting out because of it, is beneath you, etc. All of these things and more, are beneath you. You have to know this! You knowing and actually walking in this understanding, is the difference between you fighting your best fight and losing it. Remember, you are a winner, and the victory is yours for the taking. Don’t let opponents defeat you. You are better than that!
Be victorious!
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